As movie franchises go, the “Predator” films have an abundance of iconic, over-the-top, ridiculously quotable lines — way more than a normal film series. It’s likely due to the franchise’s semi-unusual combination of interesting science fiction, ’80s action movie machismo, and surprising willingness to be extremely campy. It results in movies full of lines that are absurd and yet perfectly reasonable when fighting an alien safari hunter that turns people’s skulls into trophies.
Here’s a rundown of 14 great, weird and goofy lines from “Predator,” “Predator 2,” and the newly released Shane Black movie “The Predator.”
“What’s the matter? The CIA got you pushing too many pencils?”
Everyone knows the shot of Dutch (Arnold Schwarzenegger) and Dillon (Carl Weathers) greeting each other by grabbing hands and flexing their ridiculously big arms, but Dutch’s line making fun of Dillon for getting slightly soft thanks to his desk job is icing on the sweaty muscle cake.
“Predator” is full of quotable, extremely manly dialogue, but it rarely turns up a catch-phrase — except for the time when Dutch throws a huge machete at a guy and it pins him to a wall. Dutch even stops what he’s doing for a close-up to deliver the line — because taking a moment for camp is essential to the DNA of “Predator” movies.
“I ain’t got time to bleed”
Jesse Ventura throws out this iconic line as Blain during the early portion of the movie. He gets shot but doesn’t seem to notice or care, explaining to Poncho (Richard Chaves) that he’s too busy for bleeding.
“You got time to duck?”
The part of the exchange that doesn’t always get remembered is when Poncho has a retort making fun of Blain’s nonsense macho thing about bleeding. Right after firing some grenades into a sniper nest, his response to Blain has the big guy diving for cover a second later.
“I’ll bleed ya, real quiet, and leave ya here. Got that?”
The underlying plot of the first half of “Predator” is that Dillon tricks Dutch and his rescue team to hit a rebel camp by telling them there are hostages there — but the mission is actually about taking out the rebel force and gathering intelligence. Dillon is out of practice for field ops, and when he gives away the team’s position, Mac (Bill Duke) issues this extremely credible threat — he’s almost as scary as the Predator with his delivery.
“Get to the chopper!”
Simply an iconic Schwarzenegger line that’s all about running the hell away from the Predator.
“What the hell are you?”
A ponderous moment in “Predator” toward the end, when Schwarzenegger’s Dutch asks the defeated Predator an existential question — and the Predator asks it right back. This franchise has its deep moments.
“Want some candy?”
The weird things the Predator chooses to record and repeat back to humans when he meets them are spooky in their own way. A kid offers the Predator some candy in “Predator 2,” and he repeats it to Danny Glover later, apparently just to be unsettling — because the Predator likes to murder you, but he also likes when you feel vaguely uncomfortable first.
“He’s on safari. The lions, the tigers, the bears — oh my”
Gary Busey chews scenery intensely as Peter Keyes when he finally explains to Glover’s Lt. Mike Harrigan the nature of the Predator. His delivery of the classic (and cliché) line from “The Wizard of Oz” is phenomenally over-the-top in a phenomenally Busey way.
“Okay P—yface, it’s your move”
Glover’s Harrigan takes the fight to the Predator in “Predator 2,” and even throws out some zingers along the way. Once the Predator takes his mask off, it opens up Glover to mock the creature’s weird skin flaps around his mouth, in this case while they’re both dangling off a building. It’s a perfect encapsulation of the intense camp of “Predator 2.”
No ’90s movie would be complete without it.
“F—ing you up is their idea of tourism”
The “Predator” movies all have a moment when someone sits down to explain what the deal is with all these alien murders going on, but the ones in “The Predator” are both concise and pretty hilarious. Sterling K. Brown’s Traeger has a way of explaining scary alien things in an upbeat way.
“If your mom’s vagina were a video game it’d be rated E for Everyone.”
The “Predator” films are full of dudes making sex jokes at each other. This one from Keegan-Michael Key’s character Coyle is special, in that it requires some esoteric knowledge of the video game retail rating system that provides guidance to parents.
“He’s more like a … bass fisherman”
Olivia Munn’s character Casey Bracket in “The Predator” points out, pretty aptly, that an alien that goes on safari to hunt humans for sport isn’t really a “predator,” since predators hunt for food. The answer to her assessment from Traeger is equally great: “We took a vote. Predator’s cooler.”